A Broken Hallelujah
by sariannaluvsjake2
Summary: Lucas loves Peyton. Peyton loves Lucas. But will they ever admit it?


Authors Note:

**Authors Note: **

**So, me again. Love me or hate me? Well, here's another Leyton! **

**Enjoy and R&R **

**This takes place season 4. (Peyton hasn't told him she loves him) **

**Disclaimer: I only own the ideas. **

He stood straight on the concrete. The feeling of the brittle wind rush through his blonde hair was intensifying, relaxing. He held the leather basketball tight, and just stared at the hoop before him. "Make the shot." He whispered to himself over and over. His blue eyes started to sting and he closed them tightly, knowing the sun had this effect on him. He opened his eyes quickly, and started to run forward. "Make the shot, make the shot..." He whispered to himself as he jumped into the air, slam-dunking the basketball.

It was so unique, the feeling of being in the air. Having 0 gravity, knowing that this only lasted a few short moments. He fell down back on his feet and watched as the basketball went through the hoop, then bounced onto the grass. He put a hand to his chest, feeling how hard his heart was pumping. Living with HCM wasn't easy. Neither was living with guilt.

Peyton Sawyer.

Peyton Sawyer know seemed to be a distant memory. So far away, yet so close. Peyton Sawyer was his best friend, but he wanted more. He had always wanted more, but he was too blind, too stubborn to realize it. But now he knew what he wanted. He wanted her. But he knew it was much too late. She had moved on. Peyton Sawyer was still hung up on Jake Jagielski. Well, as far as Lucas could tell.

He sighed as he ran his shaking fingers through his sweaty hair. He watched the ball continue to roll to the bench. He sighed to himself as he couldn't seem to grasp the idea of losing her, kind of like how he was losing the ball. He had had her once, and then let her go. He had tried to be so clear that he loved her the night of summer vacation, but she didn't get it.

"_**It's always going to be there isn't it? You and me." **_

It was always going to be there. But he wanted more then just a memory.

He looked up to find the Mercury Comet driving onto the flattened grass beside the court. He smiled when he saw her curly, unruly hair bounce in the bumps. She tugged on her skirt as she walked towards him. Lucas smiled at her. "So, what? You gave up on basketball and took on the sport of staring at hot girls?" She asked, smiling, walking towards him slowly, and Lucas smiled. "Well, look who's surprisingly not depressed today." He said, and Peyton giggled. "I don't get depressed...I get...bored." Lucas nodded. "Mhm..." He said, and Peyton eventually had walked all the way over to him.

"So, I kinda gotta ask you a question..." She said, and Lucas felt his heart race. "Oh no. Peyton Sawyer with a question? What ever shall I do?!" Peyton playfully hit his arm and he smiled. "Okay, shoot." She nodded. "Um...see, there's this party that Bevin's having. Kind of like a basketball appreciation slash cheerleading appreciation." Lucas nodded. "And...?" He asked smiling. "Well, I was kind wondering if you would go with me." Lucas raised an eyebrow. "Just as friends!" She added quickly, too quickly. Lucas smirked. "When is it?" He asked, and she smiled. "Tonight. 10 o'clock." Lucas nodded and put his arm around her. "I would be honored to be your acquaintance." He said formally and she smiled up at him. "Yeah, well, there's not much honor in being Peyton Sawyers friend date. Trust me." She smiled falsely at him.

"Pick me up around ten-fifteen okay?" He nodded. "I'll be seeing you."

"_**I'll be seeing you." **_

Those words stung Peyton's heart as she pulled out of his grasp and walked back to her car. He smiled and waved as she started to drive. She smiled back at him. Another fake smile. She had been giving him fake smiles for almost a month now. But she couldn't tell him the truth. She couldn't tell him that she loved him, that she wanted him so badly, she couldn't breathe. But she couldn't udder a word when the topic came up. And it was all because of her.

Brooke Davis.

Brooke Davis had been madly in love with Lucas Scott, and Brooke Davis had been Peyton Sawyer's best friend. But all that changed when Peyton fell in love with Lucas, twice. Brooke was outraged at Peyton's actions.

"_**And if we never speak again for the rest of our lives, that'll be fine." **_

Peyton Sawyer had many problems. Anyone she loved either died, ran away, or got really pissed at her and they never spoke again. Also known as her two mothers, Jake Jagielski, and Brooke. But Lucas wasn't any of those people, he was just, Lucas. Lucas was the sweetest boy a girl could have. His tender voice when something was wrong, the way he cradled her tight when she was crying, the way his smile brought her to tears. Peyton knew she shouldn't love him. But you can't control love. Right?

She waited for hours by the phone. Just hoping that Brooke would come by and take her back, but knowing she wouldn't. She couldn't. Brooke Davis hated Peyton with all her might. But Peyton had told her she had been honest. She didn't listen. Brooke Davis was indifferent.

Hours and hours went by. Peyton was just sketching. Anything she could think of. But only one thing came to mind. **Lucas Scott. **She flipped over her watch and checked the time. "10 o'clock." She whispered under her breath. Only fifteen minutes to hide the sketch of Lucas, and to find something to wear. She slipped the sketch under her bed and rummaged through her closet. Conveniently finding a black mini skirt with a purple tang top. She threw it on then looked herself in the mirror. "This is not who I am." She whispered to herself. But she didn't grasp it. She grabbed her eyeliner and applied like crazy, then taking her lip gloss.

Then she heard his footsteps coming up the stairs.

Even that one simple sound drove her crazy. She ran into the bathroom and closed the door as she combed the knots in her hair. "Peyton!" He heard her call, and her heart started to race at even the thought of him being in her room. She ripped the brush through her hair and combed the rest with her fingers. She smiled to herself in the mirror before she opened the bathroom door.

Lucas's jaw dropped to the floor.

"Yeah, that's kind of the reaction I was hoping for." She giggled, and Lucas smiled. "Peyton you look..." He whispered, his hand resting on her shoulder as he scoped her body. "...Amazing..." He finished, and Peyton started shaking from his touch. She wanted to groan when Lucas's hand rested back down at his side. Peyton looked him up and down. Muscle shirt, torn jeans, his shiny blonde hair combed perfectly. Peyton fought not to lose it.

"Well, you look hot Mr. Scott." She said, raising an eyebrow. Lucas smiled. "That was the plan." He whispered chuckling. Peyton giggled. Peyton looked into his eyes. And in those eyes, beneath all the laugher and life, was pain. Peyton sighed. "Thank you, Lucas." Lucas looked at her. "For what?" He asked, and she smiled. "For being my date, for being my friend, for being...you." Peyton smiled at him curiously. "Are you okay?" He nodded. "Yeah, yeah I am. Let's go." He said as he held his arm out for her to take as he escorted her to the car.

They drove to the party in total silence. Except for the honk of a horn or the heavy, ragged breathing of Lucas. Peyton smiled at him as she noticed he was nervous. He looked at her. And in that moment, they shared something. Neither knew what it was. Some powerful force was having an effect on both of them. Neither knew the feeling, but they knew what it meant.

This was the way it was supposed to be.

Lucas and Peyton.

"**I'll wait forever if I have to." **

She remembered her words. And the way things felt, she was going to have to wait forever to be his again.

They arrived at the party. They were immediately swarmed by their basketball and cheerleading friends who dragged them in different directions. "Oh my gosh! Peyton you showed up!" Peyton looked at her and smiled. "Yeah, why would I miss out on a great party like this?" Bevin looked at her oddly. "Why would you miss out? What does that mean? Oh! Does that mean you got lost? Oh my gosh you should have brought the invitation!" Peyton smirked. She knew there was no point walking to Bevin. She looked to her right and there she saw,

Brooke Davis.

Peyton smiled at her, and Brooke rolled her eyes and took a shot of vodka. Peyton frowned and looked the other way as she searched through the crowded house for Lucas, knowing he would make her feel better. She finally found him after about a half an hour, him pushing Rachel away while she was clearly trying to make a move on him. He kept saying, "I'm sorry Rachel, I just like someone else."

Peyton's heart started to race. Someone else? Was it her?

But then it hit her.

Maybe it was Brooke.

Lucas finally started yelling at Rachel because she wasn't backing off, and Peyton came to the rescue. "Hey, he said to leave him alone!" She yelled, and Rachel smirked at her, clearly drunk. "Oh wow, here come blonde curls of fury." She said drunkenly. Peyton rolled her eyes. "Rachel, just back off okay?" She asked politely, and Rachel snapped. "Why don't you back off?! Huh?!" She asked, shoving Peyton and Peyton feel to the floor. Lucas grabbed Rachel by the shoulders and led her to the front door. He pushed her out and closed and locked the door before jogging back to Peyton. "Are you okay?" He asked, and she nodded as he gave her his hand.

She stood up, but didn't release his hand. They just stared at each other again. Another magical spell was not letting either of them let go. This felt so...right. So meaningful, so loving. They both felt it, and they both wanted it. Peyton smiled at him, hoping he would admit to his sayings earlier. He didn't, so she spoke up over the awkward silence. "Who were you talking about earlier?" She asked, and she immediately released her hand. They both felt a rush of cold air hit them as they knew their passion was lost.

"What?" He asked, trying to avoid the question, and she smiled.

"You said that you liked someone else. Who is it?"

Lucas's heart started to race. He couldn't tell her. What if she didn't feel the same way he did? What if he would ruin it all because of it? He couldn't breathe, so he whispered. "Brooke."

Peyton felt her knees weak. Lucas felt his throat dry. He had just lied to his best friend. The girl he wanted to be his. Peyton wanted to cry. But not now, not in front of Lucas. Peyton smiled falsely at him. "Umm...Luke I gotta go, I forgot I have to do something tonight." Lucas nodded. "I'll just catch a ride with Nathan." Lucas said, and Peyton nodded. "Okay. Bye." She said, hugging him before she took off.

They both loved each other.

They both were unsure if the other felt the same way.

They never said a word.

_**5 years later: **_

Sniffles and cries were the only sounds heard as they laid former cheerleader, Peyton Sawyer, to rest. Lucas Scott stood alone. He was crowded by many people, but he felt alone. She was gone. His only love, the only person he had ever loved, his best friend, was gone. He knew he would have told her he loved her while he had the chance. Maybe that would have stopped her from overdosing. Maybe.

He cried for days on end. Never stopping. He couldn't bear to think what he had done to Peyton. Made her feel unloved, worthless. They hadn't spoken in almost a year. He was too busy with his novel, and Peyton, she was too busy not caring.

The pastor babbled on about Peyton Sawyer. The beautiful blonde with those dark hazel eyes. Eyes that once held so much pain, and now that she was in the arms of both her mother's Lucas knew she couldn't feel it anymore. But he could.

"Peyton Sawyer has a journal that she requested us to read in her will. Let us read." The pastor chanted, and Lucas felt himself shake. What had she written?

_May 3, 2007. _

_I couldn't tell him. I just couldn't do it. Lucas and I went to a party today. I wanted to tell him I loved him, that I have always loved him, that I want him. So badly. More then anyone could imagine. We shared a moment were I knew that he was the one. And I want him to be the one. _

_But I don't know if he does. _

_So I never said it. _

_And I think I never will. _

Lucas gasped. He couldn't breathe. She had loved him all this time? Just as he had loved her?

And neither of them ever said anything.

Lucas fell to the ground on his knees and started crying hysterically. This was all his fault. He should have loved her. Held her in his arms and never ever let go.

But it was too late.

Much too late.

_**Authors Note: **_

_**One-Shot Leyton! **_

_**R&R! **_


End file.
